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Journal Key:

Green = Steve | George = navy | Janet = Purple | Evelyn = Black

2/4/10 (Thursday)

Owen is now over four and a half pounds, and he is still doing well on three-hour sprints. Today we brought down some clothes for him. He was very very deeply asleep when we arrived. He did some moving around, so we thought maybe he was waking up, but when I changed his diaper before his feeding he slept through the entire process. We didn't get to hold him until one o'clock, when his sprint started. He was very much awake, then! He stayed awake and alert for the entire hour, looking at us when we talked, holding hands, and looking around the room.

His startle reflex is definitely in operation. He jerks his little arms around whenever a door clicks or someone drops something. He actually startled himself today by farting.

When our hour of holding him was up, Owen's sprint was far from over. I changed him and gave him his popper, which he definitely appreciated. At the nurse's suggestion, I put him on his side. That was exciting! It's great to hold him, but I'm not used to the idea of just sort of putting a baby in different positions. I managed it, though, and Steve put down the flaps of the blanket over the incubator. It felt weird to leave him there, wide awake, but it really was time for him to calm down and get some more sleep. He looked very happy, curled up in the dark, working on his popper.

At night, after Cara's teeth get brushed, she usually chooses to have herself flossed in our room. After we're done, she has always taken the flosser and run off to the bathroom to throw it out and rinse. Oddly, for the past couple of weeks, she has run as fast as she possibly can and then celebrated the fact that she "won."

2/5/10 (Friday)

Owen is sprinting for four hours at a time now, which is the final step before being off of the CPAP. He was sprinting when we got there, so we took him out to hold. Unfortunately, I held him and he was very hungry. He was awake and engaged in looking around for a while, but then he started looking for milk and I couldn't give him any. He was very unhappy. Steve got his popper, and he very urgently sucked on it, holding my arm with both hands, but after a little bit he realized that it was not what he had hoped it would be. His nurse started his milk through his feeding tube, and that helped.

He and his daddy got to spend some time together and talk about sports and things, which eventually put Owen to sleep. He was comfy and cuddly with Steve when I got back from pumping, and I'm pretty sure he stayed asleep when the nurse stripped him down to his diaper for kangaroo care. He got tucked up under my shirt and kind of snuggled in. When we've done this before, he's been awake the entire time, moving himself laboriously around. This time, he did what babies are supposed to do when they kangaroo: he slept and slept. At two o'clock it was time for him to go back on the CPAP. Hs stayed asleep when I put him back in the incubator and when the nurse put his shirt back on him and wrapped him up in his blanket and put his prongs back in. He was very definitely asleep.

He's certainly ready to start eating, but he's not ready to be done with his CPAP yet. His oxygenation is very good, to the extent that when it got down to 97% I thought it was low, but his breathing rate spikes an awful lot, especially towards the end of a sprint. His heartrate did a little dip, too, while he was kangarooed. Maybe in a few more days he'll be done with his prongs, but he's not done yet.

I'm not sure we mentioned that Owen has a very cute bellybutton.

Tonight was Family Fun Night! It was not a particularly eventful one, but being able to call it Family Fun Night makes it twice as exciting. We did go out to dinner. When we parked at Chili's, Cara leaned forward and said, "I don't want to wait in the car." We were glad but also somewhat surprised. Why would she? It turned out that it had been Puma talking. She was allowed to come in with us.

At preschool, we got a list of all of the children in the Lollipops and the Munchkins, so that we could send in Valentines to put into the special bags they were all making. Cara decided that tonight, when we got home, she was going to make Valentines for me and Steve. She was going to do it in her room, with the door closed. When we got home, she played with her girls for a while and then we had some hot chocolate and watched the beginning of Totoro. While this was going on and I was pumping, Cara suddenly ran off and returned with a page I'd drawn four princesses on several months ago. Their dresses were colored, but none of them had hair. She wanted me to draw another. When I could, I did. Cara decided that there was plenty more room at the top for another row of princesses. When she'd colored that one, maybe, I told her. When she'd colored it, she brought it over and folded it in half. That was the Valentine for me and Daddy. None of the girls have hair.

Cara's feeling pretty normal, but she's still blowing her nose a lot. Actually, I think she's doing it a lot more than she really needs to. She's being very good about using the hand sanitizer that I put next to all of the tissue boxes in the house. I'm proud of her.

In the bath tonight, Cara was scooping water with a tiny toy shovel. She was looking for imaginary things for her toys. Finally she found "an octopus! A baby one! It's dead. They can eat it!" Mmmm-mmm, good!

2/6/10 (Saturday)

Today we were snowed in. We had a lazy morning, made somewhat exciting by the spectacle of a small herd of deer that decided to lay down in the snow on the hill behind our house; but eventually we got outside in the snow. Cara was very interested in playing in the snow, but especially playing in the snow with PJ and Casey. They did quite a bit of sledding, and all got very red cheeks. After lunch, Cara became very excited at the idea of having PJ and Casey over. She had many plans, and went to the trouble of making a sign with an arrow. The kids came over and wandered about the house, having a good time. The main thing I remember was a long line of books laid end to end: a perfect road for toy cars.

Of course, being snowed in, we did not get a chance to go in and see Owen. As it turns out, we missed quite a milestone in his young life today, because he is now totally off his CPAP! This means he has moved to a crib instead of an incubator, and he is starting to learn how to eat. They've already tried to bottle feed him--without a lot of success--but it's a start. Evie will get to see him tomorrow, and he should finally have moved to one of the other rooms in the NICU--he was the oldest guy in the first room!

2/7/10 (Sunday)

Owen was in Room 2 in the NICU, in, as advertised, a crib. It's really a big plastic tub with some padding, but the babies seem to like them. It's the same kind of thing Cara was in when she was first born. It's weird to see him without the big plastic box of the incubator between us! He's wearing clothes, and, while there's a hat in his crib, he wasn't wearing a hat while I was there. I could tell by his heart rate monitor that he was very deeply asleep; he was down around 130 beats per minute. He was usually around 140 before he was born, and he's been mainly higher than that in the past couple of weeks.

I changed him when it was feeding time, and he sort of started to wake up. Today was the exciting day when I first got to try breastfeeding him! I know, very few people want to read about that. Sorry. We spent almost an hour and a half on our first try. The lactation expert was very important and a great help, which Owen really needed. Eventually he pretty much got the hang of things. I'd write more, but I can't think of anyone who would want to read it except me, and I can think of plenty of people who would definitely not want to read it!

Owen is on semi-demand feeding. When it's time for him to eat (at noon, three, six, and so on) they'll change him and see whether he's awake and looking for food. If he is, he'll try a bottle or, if I'm there, the breast. If he's not really awake, he gets fed through his tube. When he tries eating on his own, they keep track of what he takes and give him the rest through his tube. Eventually, he'll take it all himself.

As usual, it was hard to leave him today. He sort of woke up for his three o'clock feeding, but not quite. His noon feeding had ended around quarter to two, after all! He looked at me, but mostly he was asleep. It was time for me to go.

I had planned on stopping to get coffee on the way home, but Steve said not to. I was somewhat annoyed. I was also thoughtful. Could there be an important reason to get home? Maybe. Hmmmm. Nahhh! Maybe. It would explain why Steve did such an awesome job cleaning the house yesterday. I'd know when I pulled up, because I'd see cars outside. When I pulled up, the only ones I saw were my folks' two cars. No surprise! Then I got to the door and saw bottles of soda in the snow, and inside were my family and Hinda and Juliana and Em, who, I'm told, organized the entire thing while listening to me whining and complaining and feeling sorry for myself because I didn't get to be cute and pregnant anymore and didn't even get a shower or anything like that. The South Jersey contingent couldn't be here, because they got over two feet of snow yesterday. It was really special that so many people would come or want to come. It's the first surprise party I've ever had!

Owen and Cara and I got a lot of great gifts, and there was good food and great decorations. Em even got picture frames as party favors! Cara is especially happy with the new toys she got for being a big sister. She's particularly enjoying a doll high chair. I thought that the odds were against an actual baby doll going into it; I figured it'd be for Deesta or someone. Tiana, of the Princess and the Frog, is sitting in it, wearing new baby booties, with a bib on. One card Cara got had a sticker in it, which I got to wear. Someone pointed out that it was okay, since I am a big sister. Steve noticed that the cake had the same words on it as the cake we had at our shower for Cara: "Diapers and Pins, let the fun begin!"

2/8/10 (Monday)

We got back in to see Owen today. He had a more successful breastfeeding attempt. We stuck around long enough to do another one, and then I got a chance to try bottlefeeding him for the first time, which was pretty cool. He took some milk on every try--though we'll never know how much he took on the first attempt due to a malfunctioning scale. The little guy has hit five pounds as of today! Trying to eat is hard work, though, and he may lose a little weight as he figures things out.

The hospital had an infant CPR class today at 7 PM. This was really a terrible time for us, but the doctor convinced us it was a good idea to attend. So as soon as we got home from the hospital, Evie got back in the car for a return trip. She had a long day with lots of driving. Meanwhile, I picked up the child from preschool. She's been drawing a family of dinosaurs. She seems to have a mommy and a daddy, and intended to work on some children, but never got around to it this evening. It's odd that she draws dinosaurs at preschool, since she basically never draws them at home--I wasn't even sure the drawings were made by her. Maybe it's all those little boys at the Yellow Brick Road.

Cara and I had hot dogs; in true Daddy fashion, I neglected to check for hot dog buns before I started making hot dogs, so we ate our hot dogs on hamburger buns. We watched some Curious George--that hasn't come out for a while. I filled her tub and got distracted looking at my work email. Before I knew it, the child had already put herself in the tub and was waiting for me.

Mommy got home in time to read the last couple of stories, and now our exciting day is almost over.

2/9/10 (Tuesday)

I'm delighted that Owen seems to be making progress on the learning-to-eat front. The nurse told me this morning that in two feedings he'd taken 25 ml from his bottle, which is more than half of what he gets! When I fed him, he managed 12. This is pretty good, too. All of the nurses talk about how cute he is. Today, his nurse said, he'd been awake for a long time after his feedings. He'd just sort of hang out, working on his popper, and once in a while he'd lose it and squawk. Once he had it back, he'd be quiet again, just looking around.

After I fed him, I went to pump. He was still awake when I got back. I changed him and settled him a little, but he stayed awake. He was just looking around, waving his arms. The nurse said he'd been swinging his feeding tube like a jump rope. By now, he really seemed to want to go to sleep, but he wasn't able to. In a truly brilliant moment in parenting, I suggested that we re-swaddle him, with his arms contained this time. I went to lunch, and when I got back he was asleep and the nurse reported that she hadn't heard another peep out of him. He's not able to handle the excitement of having arms yet, I think.

Unfortunately, all of this awake-time caught up with him. Steve arrived when I was getting back from lunch, and we waited for it to be time for Owen's next feeding. When it was time, we changed him. We messed with him. We weighed him and I tried feeding him. He peeked a little bit once in a while, but, really, he was asleep. Steve held him while I went to pump, but instead of a bottle he fed Owen through his tube. It's rough when you're too tired to wake up and eat, but some people don't really have to!

2/10/10 (Wednesday)

Last night another batch of snow visited New Jersey, and it was still going this morning. I recalled a previous occasion at almost exactly the same time of the year, back when Cara was about ten months old, when we'd all been snowed in and the trees had been coated with snow on every branch in exactly the same way. We had a very slow, lazy morning, but eventually Cara and I got out while it was still snowing and had some fun. In between some shoveling the child and I threw some snow around, built a snow bunny (it was a normal snow man, but with twig ears), did some sledding, played a game which Cara invented in which we threw snow at the sled which was propped up against a piece of the collapsed snow bunny, and various other activities.

We were stuck inside for most of the rest of the day, and I think Cara got a little stir-crazy. She tried her own video game, television, various toys, but was not particularly happy doing many of them. She had a blast in the late afternoon/early evening when she went outside again with Mommy. Mommy did some more shoveling to try to keep up with the still-falling snow, but the ladies spent a lot of time outside playing in the snow. They made snow angels and rebuilt the snow bunny and sledded, and...so forth. After all that the child was very red and cold, so we had an impromptu early bath, followed by a late dinner.

We've just finished Peter Pan, which we haven't seen in ages but got pulled out today. And now the child is going to get a computer game out of me before she goes upstairs.

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